Soon after I befriended Karyn, I got to know Ron. He was part of the package deal. As many of you know, being friends with Karyn means being invited to the Smith household for dinner on countless occasions (usually for Chinese takeout that Ron was sent to fetch). I got to know Ron in his own home, where he was relaxed, when he was done with work, when he could unwind and enjoy the company at hand-- whomever Karyn had invited over.

Soon after they moved into our neighborhood in Endwell, Ron quickly caught on that most of the female neighbors had similar names-- two Mary Anns, a Mary Ellen, a Mary Lou, etc. Before long, Ron had a small plaque made with his wife's new name-- Mary Karyn, just so she felt part of the "Patio Drive Club", helping her to fit in and be a piece of the continent of Endwell. They were great neighbors and Bob and I miss them still.

Being in Ron's company meant you were sure to laugh. Not those polite, reserved and measured grins of pedigreed ladies and gentlemen, but big, hearty, loud belly laughs that fed his soul. Can anyone tell a story and nail a punch line as well as Ron? I think not. Can anyone so easily pluck from the recesses of his brain more fascinating, conversational and topical information than Ron? I think not. When in his company, I used to think, "how in the world does he know all this stuff and even more intriguing, how in the world does he remember all the details?" Of course, he was an educated man, an avid reader, always challenging himself to learn more about everything that interested him or interested someone he cared about. How many of us received articles cut from newspapers or magazines about something he knew we cared about? I wish I were more like him because there is something really special and alluring about being in the company of a human Encyclopedia Britannica-- the revised, updated and current edition.

If you don't already know this, I want you to... Ron was Mensa material. Surely, you've heard of them-- those REALLY genius folks who have their own smarty-pants club, an elite membership with no riff-raff "normal IQers" allowed. He never bragged about his endless wealth of knowledge, nor did he use it for evil (meaning he never used it to put someone "down" or to raise himself above the masses, though he could have). Rather, he shared it, mostly in humor, and only when comfortable with the crowd, with those of us who paid attention to him and got to know the man called Doctor Ron Smith.

Very quietly, and without fanfare, Ron performed many acts of kindness-- we all have healthy eyes because of him. At first, I felt uncomfortable about receiving free services, until I found a way to repay him. I began to do something for Ron that Karyn wouldn't or rarely did. I cooked for him. When Karyn would take off for long weekends to Maryland, leaving Ron home alone, I'd bring him home cooked dinners. Nothing fancy or gourmet. Just old-fashioned foods made from scratch-- meatloaf, beef stew, spaghetti sauce and meatballs, chocolate chip cookies, pound cake, and his favorite-- mashed potatoes. You see, being married to Karyn, Ron thought mashed potatoes came out of a box, like instant oatmeal.

Entertaining Ron, by playfully torturing Karyn was fun for me, and I know Ron was tickled when I named him and Stacey (who was a college student at the time) "The Neglecterinos". Ron loved it, because any time I inquired about the welfare of the "Neglecterinos," he knew it meant tupperware containers of warm, homemade food would be delivered to him at dinner time, whenever Karyn had skipped town.

One Easter, I remember inviting Karyn and Ron over to our house for dinner. Karyn was somewhat reticent about joining us for this religious holiday dinner, but I heard Ron in the background asking, "is she making mashed potatoes?" Of course, the answer was yes, and he said, "Tell her we're coming-- I can be Catholic for an afternoon." That was Ron.

To be fair to Karyn, she did cook for Ron-- twice a year I think. Of course, to perform this task, she needed a week off from work for each episode of cooking. Karyn cooks a fine brisket, which I know Ron loved, an amazing kugel, and the absolute BEST chicken soup I've ever had in my life.

Recently, someone reminded me of this: friends are the family we get to choose. I am truly honored and very glad to have known such a fine, unpretentious and generous man. For the rest of my life, whenever I'm whipping up a batch of "bah-day-das," I will fondly think of Ron.  I think he'd like that.